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Post by destinyinevitable on Feb 6, 2007 5:34:20 GMT
Yeah..let's figure it out tomorrow. I'll go ahead and warn you guys, I CAN NOT do the first chapter. I've got to brush myself up on Shakespeare. I'll do that tonight.
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Post by lillyfan123 on Feb 6, 2007 5:35:37 GMT
*backs away slowly* I'm out when it comes to the first chapter! HAHA! Safe!
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Post by destinyinevitable on Feb 6, 2007 5:38:35 GMT
*laughs* Well, Jojo seems to know the story the best..perhaps she should start? Maybe Allie? I dunno.
I volunteer to go second! ..Or third. Just not fourth. I don't like fourth for some reason...
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Post by lillyfan123 on Feb 6, 2007 5:40:22 GMT
I'll write the end. (or atemp to) if nobody else wants to. (I mean the sad one.)
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Post by destinyinevitable on Feb 6, 2007 5:44:23 GMT
We'll see. If we're lucky we can find a way for each of us to write 2 chapters. We should probably go with a cycle pattern, once we figure out who goes first.
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Post by lillyfan123 on Feb 6, 2007 5:45:50 GMT
I honestly dont have a prefrance just.....not the first one! EDIT:I'm geting up early for no particular reason, so night. *yawn* Kinda tired.  |
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Post by destinyinevitable on Feb 6, 2007 5:52:27 GMT
Nighty night.
Any volunteers to go first?
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Post by allie on Feb 6, 2007 12:15:29 GMT
Good morning, everyone! ^^
And hey! Here's the first chappie of my new fanfic! Enjoy! X3
Rachel whimpered a little, rubbing her arm that was covered by her tiger-stripped sweater as she made her way down the hall to her office in the Moonbase.
She couldn’t cry, she was the commander of the entire KND organization. Commanders never cried one bit.
Her parents were divorced. Her mother and little brother moved far away from the town…away from Rachel and her father. Mr. McKenzie had gained full custody over Rachel, and now was now alcohol addicted, right after the divorce.
Rachel came home every night, really late like she always does, then- SMACK!
“Where the hell have you been, girl?! Ya better have a good excuse right now, ‘cause last time didn’t work!” He…abused her, badly.
Rachel shook her head, getting back into reality. It was only a flashback…just a flashback.
“Why is he…doing this to me…?” Rachel asked herself. “Why does he do this to me…?”
“Rachel?” a certain voice from a British boy startled her. She knew that accent so well.
Rachel turned and faced him. Nigel Uno, the one who gave her a good feeling in her stomach, seeing him as her hero, her crush.
“Oh, Nig-Numbuh 1…hi…” she said, holding her arm with her other.
Nigel raised a brow. “Why are you holding your arm like that, sir?” He took a few steps towards her.
Rachel stepped back. “It’s nothing…” Nigel shook his head. “It doesn’t seem like nothing. Let me have a look, Rachel. You and I are the only ones here.” He thought it over.
“Are you still upset about your parents’ divorce?” he asked.
Her parents’ divorce was quickly around the Moonbase. The only thing she didn’t tell the operatives there that she had an alcohol addicted father that hit her and yell every time she came home really late at night.
“No, it’s not that…I-I can’t tell you…”
“You can tell me anything, Rachel. We’re the only ones in this hallway, after all.” He was right. No one had walked in these halls for a bit now. Nigel smiled. “Now, let’s have a look at that arm of yours,”
Rachel didn’t hesitate. Nigel rolled up her sleeve, and his eyes narrowed. “What…what is this?” He began to stroke her arm with his fingers, gently. Her arm was bruised, terribly.
Rachel thought of a quick excuse. “It’s just a scratch, Numbuh 1…that’s all!” she lied. “I…I did it in P.E. last week…” Tears were dripping down the sides of her cheeks.
Nigel looked up at her, from her abused arm. “You’re lying; I can see it in your eyes. This bruise looks awfully fresh.” He shook his head.
“Rachel, have you been having any certain problems at home…with your father, that I should know about?”
“No…I-he…I’m sorry, Nigel…I can’t tell you…” She lowered her head to the floor. Nigel raised his hand to her cheek, tilting her head up and looks up at him.
“You can and you will. I see it in your eyes, Numbuh 362! Your father is abusing you and you can’t do anything about it. Your father a is drunk, abusing his own child, and it’s illegal.”
Rachel turned her head away from her crush. “I…I need to go home, now...dad will be waiting for me when I get there and…” She was cut off by Nigel, who had wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into a hug.
“I’m going with you, tonight. And there’s no way you’re going to try and stop me.”
OMG, yay! Numbuh 1 is gonna protect her! X3
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Post by lillyfan123 on Feb 6, 2007 14:40:26 GMT
YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!  I'm so excited! Poor Rachel...BUT I'M SO EXCITED! ....but poor Rachel. BUT EXCITED. But Rachel..... |
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Post by NumbuhInfinity on Feb 6, 2007 15:30:36 GMT
*twitch*
Excited. When you're psyched about something, it's spelled excited. >_> Sorry, I just find the "exiting/exited" typo one of pet peeves.
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Post by krossfire on Feb 6, 2007 17:01:10 GMT
Man, can't imagine it'd be that dark... but hey, it's your story. Looking forward for the rest. |
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Post by lillyfan123 on Feb 6, 2007 17:29:35 GMT
Oops. Sorry NumbuhInfinity. My spelling sucks. I'll fix it. ;D
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Post by NumbuhInfinity on Feb 6, 2007 19:36:20 GMT
@lillyfan123:
Yay. It wasn't a huge deal or anything, I'm not singling you out in case you feel that way. Just that I see that typo a lot in forums and fics.
@allie:
Oooh, that's not good for Rachel, poor girl. It's a nice read. Though I do wonder if the "crush" mentions in the narration were necessary. It seems as if it could work pretty well as a friendship/non-romantic fic... as well (<-- was that redundant?).
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Post by lillyfan123 on Feb 6, 2007 19:50:08 GMT
Naw, its cool. I didn't feel like that. ;D
@friendshipness fic
Well, it probably was a bit redundant. Umm, to both I mean. It still could have been a couple one without revealing the crush, then again, the CC is about the couple, not the friendship, even though they both rule. However, since I'm kinda addicted to the couple, I like the fact it is a romance ficcy. ;D
BTW-Soo, cant wait for the next chapter!
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Post by allie on Feb 6, 2007 21:33:19 GMT
Wow...Thanks for the comments, everyone! ^_^
@friendshippy fic/Nonromantic fic
Actually, I hate to break it to you, NumbuhInfinity....there will be romance in it. <3 Well, in one chapter....which I'm planning to type tonight or earlier if I can.
Where does the romance start, you all ask? They both run to the park to get away/hide out from Mr. McKenzie and his shiny shot-gun. (The guy's drunk, if you forgot)
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I'm so excited! Poor Rachel...BUT I'M SO EXCITED! ....but poor Rachel. BUT EXCITED. But Rachel.....
